The pluck (heart, liver and lungs of a sheep), boiled in it’s own stomach with seasonings and oats and onions and more, for a long, long time. Sounds like torture for sheep and diner alike? Well, it doesn’t have to be; crafty vegetarians have been creating veggie versions of this Scottish delight for years. Serve it up with some neeps (turnips), tatties (potatoes) and a pint of McEwan’s, and you’re ready to beat back the encroaching English. Or at least enjoy a drink with them.

Here’s an exemplary recipe from Lisa Ferguson, chosen by NKRH for its non-use of fake-meat and its brilliant inclusion of whiskey (that’s Scotch whiskey, duh). As with many vegetarian adaptations of traditional dishes, this haggis is big on seasoning, starch and flavor.

And here’s a packaged vegetarian haggis, produced by the folks at MacSween:

If you think this stuff looks bad, imagine the vegetarian version’s blood and guts relatives. In truth, this vegetarian haggis is an absolute delight. MacSweens’ website also provides a list of interesting recipes for the haggis beginner and expert alike: haggis burgers, haggis pakoras, stuffed peppers with haggis, and more.

Finally, the reason why I ever got on this in the first place is a presciently named pub, the Last Drop Tavern, which sits just outside the old gallows in Edinburgh. Simply put, nothing beats a plate of vegetarian haggis in a beautiful city full of beautiful people, near an old noose. Nothing.

And finally, this is as good of a time as any to outline…

NKRH travel tip #2: Don’t ever order Budweisers and Heinekens when traveling. Always ask the bartender instead to recommend a good local beer.